Tuesday 9 September 2014

"Them things you hide ain't hiding"





Sometimes you hear something that makes you stop what you’re doing and the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.  An instant connection, a recognition.  When I first heard Kate Tempest on Channel 4 speaking her Poem, The Mouse Hiding Out In The Lions Hair I was struck.  Struck by the amazing wisdom in one so young and the way she put the world into words.

I’ve tried twice before to see her but was beaten back the first time by a badly timed ferry and then stress related stomach cramps on route to The Round House. But last weekend there I was sitting in a setting that Shakespear would recognise, far away from life’s madness, hanging on every word.




Then Monday morning, back to the madness.  I’ve been busy of late with the new jiggery pokery that is The Children and Families Act 2014 part 3.  It states that Local Authorities must now consult with parents about the new Education and Health Care Plans and The Local Offer that are both to be drawn up.  I have been a bit of a mouse in the last few years, hiding out.  I’ve been to my fair share of consultations and stakeholders meetings in the past where parents are tolerated but not taken seriously.  I’ve sat in meetings where “professionals” have talked openly about their feelings towards parents and I’ve been shocked.  I’ve spoken up but it always felt like a squeak and a risky one at that when your child is under their power. So I threw in the towel.

Time heals they say or makes you forget so when I was asked to sit around that table again a bit more worldly and knowledgeable I found my voice a little stronger and I invited some of the most wonderful people I know along to add to the wisdom.  The Local Authority made promises and asked what documents I’d like to be sent to review.  The documents on education for the Local Offer never arrived until after the deadline and the drafts of the Education and Health Care plans arrived just in time for the summer holiday when us parents are caring 24/7 for our youngsters.  All an administrative error, apparently.  Spare me the indignity of such a poor and patronising excuse.  But nevertheless we met up, we studied, we took advice from the Special Educational Needs Code of Practice and managed to get a report together to send out to them before the deadline.  There was hope, I was proud that we’d all managed to juggle things around, gone through the stress of leaving the house for 3 hours one evening and put our heads together.  

We got there too late apparently and our views will not be taken into consideration until the next review in December.  Until the general "them and us" attitude is put to one side and we are respected as equal partners in this, change and progress will be restricted which is sad for children, young people and adults with SEN and disabilities.

But in the meantime as Ms Tempest would say “them things you hide ain’t hiding” and we will be jumping in between the lines and reading books that are so open they are shameless.  

Being a parent of a child with Autism can happen to anyone…….anyone so why treat us like we’re different and less?